As a person of faith, one of the hardest things for me is to look at the bad in this world and make sense of it. It’s dark and I’m afraid of the dark. I’m afraid of being hurt. Young children are afraid of the dark…afraid of being hurt. I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to live in darkness but so many people have throughout the history of mankind and many today live there still. The darkness of sin. We each of us grapple with our own sins but to live in the darkness of the sin of others inflicted upon us is a place my mind shies away from but that is reality for others. Why does God allow that? Why does He allow incest, war, hate, greed?

A very dear friend once told me that she learned to trust God no matter the outcome. No matter the outcome. In all honesty I couldn’t imagine that.

I come to that every time my mind strays toward the unfathomable. The darkness of the reality of evil in our world. Do I trust God? No matter the outcome?

There was a time of evil and darkness that we cannot fully comprehend today. The disciples lived through it and Jesus was gone. They were witnesses to it and bore the burden of trying to grasp what their mind naturally didn’t want to see just like I shy away from the darkness of evil today. In the midst of that Jesus appeared to the disciples after he was resurrected and had ascended to the Father in Heaven. He came to them. One of the disciples, Thomas, wasn’t there. When Thomas next saw the disciples, they told him Jesus had come to them and he didn’t believe them. Try to imagine what Thomas must have felt. Left out? Confused? Disbelief? The darkness of what he knew to be real was still there. The darkness we know to be real today is still here.

Now Thomas (also known as Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!” Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” John 20:24-29.

No matter the outcome. Sins still exist and the darkness of evil is very present and people are living in the midst of it – scared of being hurt, killed, raped, not loved, unlovable. God is aware. He sees every bit of it. He shares our pain because He has felt it and feels it still. The love of God is what gives me hope. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lost heart. Hebrews 12:2-3.

Don’t lose heart God tells me. Stop doubting and believe. In the midst of the darkness of this world God is able to enter through locked doors and assure us of His love and Presence. 1 John 4:16: God is love. 1 John 1:5: This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. No darkness. There is darkness in this world but we have the assurance of God that the darkness will not last forever. I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33. Lord, help me believe because I see.